Hey everyone I hope you’re all okay?
Firstly sorry if this is a bit of a ranty blog post.. i just wanted to get everything out there of how I’m feeling sometimes. Also this isn’t this weeks main blog post.. I just wanted to post this to get things off my mind.
So… Like most post people with chronic illnesses you have good days and bad days… We try to thrive on the good days and just cope with the bad ones..
The main thing is that we ALL want to try and live life as “Normally” as possible.. that’s what I hear and say myself all the time… “I just want to live my life as Normally as possible” trying everyday to manage and deal with the fact that I have an invisible illness that sometimes doesnt give me any symptoms so therefore I have the split second of feeling normality, which in turn makes me feel great and so I push myself a bit……That’s the mistake I make constantly….Because when I do this… I then suffer for it the following day!
Then there’s the other thing… I’ve had a few people say to me recently.. “I don’t want you to be ill”….Hmmm…. You know what… I don’t particularly want to be ill at the ripe age of 26 (diagnosed at 24) either!! Funny that isn’t it?! I think that’s what’s been bothering me the most of late…That phrase from people.. sometimes I want to turn around and shout at them “How do you think I feel? Do you think i want to be ill too?… Do you think I want to be in bed by 9:30 most nights just to ensure I get enough rest for the following day? Do you think I want to have to plan every little trip I do to ensure I don’t waste energy or become fatigued? Do you think I want to turn down nights out or meals out because I’m too knackered and just want to go home?!……NO….All I want is to be normal!!”
But then thinking about all this got me thinking (lol)…. What is normal?! Who is normal? I don’t think anyone leads a “normal’ life.. everyone’s life is unique and different in some way.. the word normal.. suggests that you just exsist… Whereas living a “Unique Life”… Now that sounds better… I was able to think about this whilst practicing my Yoga routine (Yoga is amazing I’d definitely recommend it!!)
I thought… I don’t live a “Normal life”… I live a “Unique Life”… Where yes I have to go to bed early so that I can embrace the following day… Yes I have to plan trips right down the last detail so that I can fully enjoy them and have a great time… Yes i turn down going in the evenings if I’ve had a particularly busy day and need the rest… I DO NOT push myself.. I’m learning that resting when you need to and taking your time is far more important as you get to enjoy life’s little moments!
So this blog post is to help anyone out there who is struggling or finding it difficult to accept things… Whatever they may be… Do not let other people tell you how you feel.. if anyone tells you that you just need to try and live your life as “Normally” as possible… You say to them NO! I will live a unique life, one that allows me to enjoy all aspects of life… If someone tells you that “they don’t want you to be ill” you say to them… Well no… I don’t want to be ill either.. but I am.. nothings going to change and we must embrace it and work with it.
Stand up for your illness… Dont shut it out or hide it away.. and also don’t hide yourself away either.. embrace your unique life and work with your illness so you can enjoy your life as much and humanly possible.. however that may be!
So… That is all I have to say about that lol.. I know it’s a little “rant” but I do try to turn things from negatives into positives.. so hopefully this has helped someone..
I’ll see you all in tomorrow’s post and i hope you’re having a good weekend!