A More Relaxing Week & MS Appointments

Hello Everyone! Happy Sunday, how are you all this morning?

I am feeling really quite good at the moment, I’ll link to a previous blog post about being 1 year with NO relapses! 1 Year NO Relapses I don’t know whether its the Copaxone injections that are making me feel good (when talking to others about it they’ve mentioned that it hasn’t made them feel better, just reduces their relapses) but of course EVERYONE with MS is different so I don’t solely go by other peoples main experiences.

I feel like its a combination of things that are helping me to feel well…great! Reducing stress where possible (I’m really quite relaxed most of the time), Reducing my hours at work, Changing my diet and generally looking after myself.

I feel so grateful, happy and positive and again I think that’s another reason why MS is keeping a low profile at the moment — don’t get me wrong I still struggle with fatigue and nerve pain on a daily basis (In fact I have annoying nerve pain right now) but I’ve learnt to manage it.

Anyway back to this week! (I do ramble!) well, this week has been a lot calmer than the previous week. Work was quite busy on Monday and Tuesday and then on Wednesday I popped over to mum’s and saw her and my sister (my sister and I walked her beautiful dog Tilly and the scenery was just beautiful!) They then came over for dinner and we had a lovely evening.

T

Thursday again was a lovely day. A friend from work (used to be my manager but we are very close friends too) came over to see me and we had a lovely catch up that I just loved and then the weekend has involved, working Friday & Saturday and then Saturday night I made myself a lovely Mexican dinner for one and watched this Youtuber that I’m currently obsessed with called Brogan Tate XO – again I’ll link one her videos if you’d like to check her out, she’s amazing and so relatable! Brogan’s YouTube channel

I also have a new YouTube video available today at 5:30pm UK time talking all about my experience with Working & MS and I’d be ever so grateful if you could check that out and maybe share my channel to people and that’s something I really work hard on and would love it if it would just help others maybe newly diagnosed or just going through a hard time — I’d like to think I’m relatable.

My YouTube Channel – An Ordinary Girl With MS

So that everyone has been this week! Today (Sunday) I’m totally relaxing, it’s a gorgeous crisp sunny morning here so I’m going to have a little walk to our local shop and just really rest my body and mind today ready for another busy few weekends! Next week we are training at work as we are moving into a shiny new store so I shall talk about that next week!

I hope you’ve all have a super weekend and a great week!

Lots of Love always

Hannah

New YouTube Channel, Family Time and Nerve Pain! :)

Hi everyone, long time no speak! I know I haven’t uploaded a blog post in a couple of weeks, how are you all doing? As always leave me a comment below and we can all connect.

So… Last Sunday was the first day that my new YouTube Channel launched An Ordinary Girl With MS

untitled

I’ve got 2 official videos uploaded now that you can watch, the first one is all about “My Diagnosis” — what happened, how I was diagnosed and how I felt. The second video is all about “What is MS” — I’ve seen many videos on YouTube explaining what MS (Multiple Sclerosis) is in a rather negative way “You’re going to become disabled”, “Everything will stop working” “It’s incurable” — I mean yes, these phrases might become reality to some, however everyone with MS is completely DIFFERENT!! That’s why in my video I really try a put across the reality of MS in a positive way.

I really hope you can spread the word about my channel and I hope that it brings comfort to some of you too living with MS, or even if you’re not it can bring you some understanding about the condition.

I’ve also had quite a stressful week too — in fact very stressful which in turn has caused my MS symptoms to really flare up, I booked today off work as a holiday so that I could completely rest my body (and write this blog post obvs lol) I don’t want to go into the stresses that I’ve had but yes, I’ve had quite enough for the time being thank you.

I’ve also had some great family times too.

Last Saturday I went up to my hometown to see my dad and Nana where we met the wedding photographer to get him booked for the wedding– seriously it’s getting so close now and I’m so excited! I just can’t wait to marry my best friend in the whole world! We had a wonderful day and I also managed to grab a cheeky first class ticket on the train there and back which was amazing!

It was my little sisters birthday last week and we had a great day visiting a beautiful stately home and a fantastic antique shop (I was in heaven!) We also went to see The Nun too (relatively new horror film — The Conjuring universe) I had a wonderful yet exhausting time another reason why I booked today off.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Image result for the nun

And finally… nerve pain! I haven’t had it for a long time and I know that due to the pressures and stresses that I’ve had over the last week, its set things off. I’m actually filming a video about ways to manage nerve pain so I hope you like that too 🙂

I have a lot of hot water bottles, baths, lots of light yoga (stretching really helps), I try not to sit still for long periods because I find the pain gets worse unless I’m literally lying on the floor then that’s okay but I get dizzy after a while. I also fuel myself with lots of anti-inflammatory foods, loads of ginger, literally have so much ginger and cinnamon and dark leafy greens… I really do pump my body full of these foods when my MS is playing up and it really does help.

 

I really hope you’ve enjoyed this light, short blog post this week. Please check out my YouTube channel if you get the chance 🙂 I’m now going to go for a little walk to try and relieve this pain. Hopefully my next blog post I shall be pain-free!

Have a wonderful week.

lots of Love always

Hannah xx

“With Every Limitation, There is an ADAPTION!”

Hello everyone, it’s me again! How are you all? I hope you’ve all had a good, reasonably relaxing week. As always leave me a comment below and we can connect 🙂

You’re probably wondering what this blog post is going to entail due to the title? Well, this is my second new motto (need to get it copyrighted lol) as you know the first motto that I’m still sticking with “Not My Problem” has been a great success and really made me have a different outlook with everything.

I’d say in the last few months I’ve been struggling a little (I’m generally fine — yes dad I know you’ll be reading this and worrying lol hehe) I’ve just been struggling with some MS symptoms and just getting a little down about them — let me explain.

A few months ago I felt like I was just going up and up with my health, I had more energy, I was walking further and fatigue was rather limited. In the last couple of months, things seem to have just taken a slight downhill with regards to symptoms. In general, fatigue has really been knocking me back, brain fog has been a constant pain in my ass and just generally not feeling great, combined that with my Copaxone injection sites playing up, I’ve just felt a little fed up recently. As you know I do everything to look after myself and listen to my body.

I think these feelings have just been building up as kind of like a mask over the past few months and it’s only now that they’re making an appearance. The other day at work I was talking to a couple of my colleagues (also amazingly support true friends) and when I mentioned that I was struggling, the tears emerged. It shocked me a little because I guess I’ve just been blocking things out a little and just trying to live with this illness, but when emotions come out… they come out!

My friends were so amazing (It’s nice to get a different approach to life from someone who’s not emotionally attached in a way) They reminded me of what I’ve actually been through this month:-

The summer cold — that knocked it out of me for a good while

My PIP Tribunal — That probably knocked it out of me the most and when I think about it, I’m probably still recovering from that as it was incredibly stressful.

The worry of George with his job — Not going to speak about this, but he’s fine now and in a much better place, however, it was still a worry at the time.

Still working 6 hours a week and learning new skills at work — I’ve mentioned before in a previous blog post that its not just ‘working 6 hours’ I have to leave the house at 7:40am and I don’t get home until 4:15 and work can be quite busy (I love my job and the people I work with & would never complain about them — we are like a family even though they know the industry is not my passion)

So with these four things that they mentioned they told me how well I’m coping! I mean soon I won’t have had a relapse for a year!! that’s fantastic!! I just need to cut myself some slack, listen to my body and I WILL get stronger in time! 🙂

So… the title of this blog post “With Every Limitation There Is An ADAPTION” — this is so true for example the day after the PIP tribunal I was supposed to go shopping with a friend (Retail Therapy) but I felt beyond exhausted, drained really, however, we went into town and hired a wheelchair from ‘Shop Mobility’. My limitation was my chronic fatigue and weakness in my left leg, but the adaption — the wheelchair enabled me to have fun, go shopping and buy some nice things!

This is what I mean by the motto. Another example, the other day I made a big portion of Stir Fry for myself to have over the next few days, I came home from work one day & felt exhausted, however, I didn’t need to cook anything because it was already done!

In life there are always adaptions that can be made in pretty much every situation, I’m learning this and it’s really helping me to live with MS, still have a life and fun but also it’s teaching me to listen to my body.

I now know with this new motto things are going to get better, I know that slowly but surely I’ll get stronger again and these symptoms will get easier to manage and deal with.

Today is a total relax day with my boys! I love these days and I’m now going to go and do a little light yoga to stretch out from the night’s sleep.

I hope you all have a great week, remember my motto — use it, share it and live by it!

Love to you always,

Hannah — An Ordinary Girl Living Life With Multiple Sclerosis — Bossing Life!! xxx

My PIP Tribunal, What happened & What it was really like.

Hey everyone, how are you? I haven’t been on here much over the last week because I’ve been a bit preoccupied. I’ve had my PIP Tribunal.

For those who don’t live in the UK or who don’t know what PIP is, it’s called Personal Independence Payment, it’s a benefit that helps Disabled maintain and live a relatively independent and slightly normal life. It helps people via weekly payments, mobility aids and extra benefits such as a disabled parking badge for their car and bus/railcards. It really can make someone’s life so much better and easier than what it is. It’s supposed to “give” them a life.

Unfortunately, though, our government are making things so hard for people with Disabilities receive the help they really need and unfortunately, people with MS suffer a lot with this. Over a third with MS get turned down or denied PIP and I was one of those people.

You start off by ringing the DWP (Department of Working Pensions) and ask to make a claim for PIP. They then send out an application form which you have to fill out and send off (This is the first incredibly stressful and difficult stage) once you’ve filled that out you send it back to the DWP along with any evidence you have about your illness such as doctors notes, letters from GP’s, Physios etc.

Now I had all this information and more including letters from my Opticians, managers at work and even letters from my Councillor. I sent all my paperwork off to the DWP and waited to hear back.

They got back in touch with me about 3 weeks later saying that I needed to attend a “Face to Face” interview. I was a little disheartened when I saw this letter come through, I’ve heard all about the Face to Face interviews and some of them are very misleading. The “Nurses” seem like they are being sympathetic, supportive and generally nice when in actual fact, they’re watching your every move the second they see you or if anyone else is with them, they’re watching you.

I’m not going to go into my assessment because this post is about the Tribunal, so obviously you know that I’ve had to fight to this extent.

For the tribunal I had so much support and guidance from the charity called DIAL and also from the MS Society, other peoples experiences and youtube so I knew kind of what to expect, however it still made me feel very anxious and stress — which consequently made my symptoms a lot worse cause me to have a mini set back, after I was actually doing well — thank you DWP thank you very much!

The Day of the Tribunal – 8th August 2018

The day of the tribunal… I was awake at 5:30 going through all my documents thinking about what questions I’d be asked. My nerves weren’t actually too bad but I think that’s because I was mentally drained and physically exhausted from the last 48 hours.

The great thing about it was that I had amazing support with me on the day, my dad and my aunt came with me (They live over 100 miles away — they’re awesome) and also my Disability support worker joined us to help me too. I felt so supported and this really helped me, it didn’t help my nerves lets face it I was still terrified but just having them there really meant a lot.

My MS symptoms on the day were horrendous, whenever I’m bad or I’m put under stress that I have no control over then my symptoms just go crazy. I lost control over my left leg (using one crutch to drag it behind me), my whole body was riddled with fatigue and I just felt awful!

When we got to the Majestrates court we noticed that there was a disabled entrance (Thank you!!) — however when we got there we were told that their lift wasn’t working and that they didn’t have wheelchairs!! My Dad and Aunt were furious, it was like they were already out to get me — not to mention they don’t have accessibility for disabled people apart from a very steep ramp that I had to drag myself up!! I got just under half way up and broke down — it hit me!! I stood there a cried to my Dad and Aunt, I was just so overwhelmingly exhausted and just felt that I couldn’t go on, however, their words gave me the strength to keep going.. keep up the fight!!

Got in there, got past security and sat in the waiting area with everyone else — there were no signs to tell me where I needed to go. All of a sudden we saw my disability support worker who told us that we were waiting in the wrong section!!

Before we went into the courtroom (A big office room) we saw the clerk who briefly went through everything and explained what I was going to expect. They mentioned that there was a judge, a doctor and someone who was either disabled themselves or who knew about disabilities who were going to be questioning me. There was also someone from the DWP representing them, however, they were not allowed to interrogate me.

We then went into the room, I cried a lot throughout the whole process, I couldn’t help it, it just all came out! The judge started explaining obviously why we were there and it was almost as if they didn’t agree with what the DWP had awarded me (nothing!) in the first place.

They then introduced the doctor, the Disability associate, moving onto who I had brought with me and then finally introducing the DWP representative.

In all honesty, the questions are all a blur now, I think I was just so exhausted I’ve kind of blocked out the experience. I remember that the doctor asked me how I got to court (very important as they’re trying to find out how well you are and especially if you have an unpredictable condition/disability like MS.

The doctor then wanted to take me back to when I was first diagnosed etc — this was over 4 years ago may I add! I can’t remember last week let alone specific details from 4 years ago! They kept referring to the documents that I had presented and I answered the questions honestly and in detail — this is also important, don’t go over the top because they will know, also don’t give one worded answers because that won’t help you either.

We then moved onto the Disability associate, they wanted to ask me questions about my walking and daily living — for example, how many metres I could walk…

This 20-metre rule that PIP/DWP have released is just so ridiculous!! I’m asking all ‘normal’ people how many metres do you walk a day?? Do you measure? no? I didn’t think so!! When I was being asked about how many metres certain walks were I just broke down, It’s hard enough living with MS sometimes but then thinking about and measuring how many metres I walk on a daily basis is just absolutely crazy and this needs to be scrapped!! I’m doing some work with the MS Society to scrap the 20-metre rule and I’ll insert a link here if you’d like to sign their petition! Scrap 20m Rule PIP

I was then asked about my ‘good days’– my answer to these questions was this “I never have a ‘good’ full day with MS… I have a good 5-6 hours if I’m lucky and then I crash with fatigue!” most people with chronic, invisible illnesses don’t have good full days, I mean waking up in the morning, bouncing out of bed and then on the go all day then going out in the evening, still going. That doesn’t happen with me anymore and do you know I’m fine with that, I’ve adapted and yet I have people from the DWP telling me that I’m not ‘sick’ or ‘disabled’ enough to receive any help at all to enable me to live a slightly more normal life!

After all the questioning — went on for just over an hour the judge said that I’d done really well and that they were happy to give me my result on the day (they can either give it to you on the day or post it out to you) I asked for it to be on the day. I’d gone through enough mental and physical stress, I just wanted it to be over — at this point, I didn’t care if they didn’t award me with any help.

I had to wait outside for a little bit while they deliberated and decided on their result, then I was called back through.

I WON!!!! I was awarded standard rate mobility with PIP, this entails 22.56 pounds per week that’s paid every 4 weeks, a blue badge — disability parking badge, which means that I’ll be able to park in the disabled places and also I’m entitled to a bus pass.

The DWP representative was actually nice, they said that they agreed with the results and that I deserved it — this made me happy and also annoyed. it wasn’t their fault personally but because of the DWP not believing me at the assessment it has resulted in a lot of unnecessary stress causing my symptoms to worsen — the DWP need to realise what they put genuine people through who don’t want all the benefits — believe me, I don’t benefit from something that I don’t need them for, all I wanted was a little bit of help to enable me to live a slightly normal life as a 28-year-old!!

I have to say that everyone on the day was amazing! The judge, Doctor and Disability associate were supportive, understanding and patient with me. My Aunt knew as soon as we went in that they were going to be on my side and that was very reassuring.

Also, what you need to remember — DON’T GIVE UP!!! KEEP FIGHTING!! The DWP needs to be fought and be told what is happening to innocent people out there!! Also, this is YOUR tribunal.. the Judge, Doctor and Disability associate only want to hear from you mainly, they want to know how YOU feel and how YOUR condition affects you. Everything the DWP wrote in their report they disregard and start a ‘fresh’ decision.

My final words… It wasn’t very pleasant in fact it was horrid and I have had to allow my body to recover for the last 3-4 days!! this could of all been avoided if the DWP had actually believed me and all my evidence in the first place!!

I’m sorry for the really long blog post this week… but this needs to be spoken about and the DWP and the British Government need to be aware of whats going on!

My next post will be a lot more positive lol.. I hope you’ve all had a great week, as always leave your comments in the comments section and I’ll reply to you 🙂

All my love always

Hannah xx

Going Back To Work…Again

Hello everyone, how are you all? Leave me a comment below letting me know how your day is going.

As the title would suggest… I’m going back to work today… Again. Now the ‘again’ part of the title is because I’ve been through this before this year when I had my first fairly big relapse of the year. I wasn’t off work for as long as this relapse, however my doctor feels that I went back to work too early and should off probably had longer off… But when you get very little money whilst being off sick, it makes it difficult to remain off so therefore I had to go back to work sooner.

I have also done phased return once before as well and again my doctor and many others felt that I rushed going back to work full time and that I should of had a longer phased return period… But once again… Money was the issue and I couldn’t really afford to continue the phased return so I went back to work full time maybe too soon, who knows because at that time I honestly thought I was okay.. I felt a lot better in myself and I thought I was ready to go back full time… You just never know with MS – there’s no explanation as to why we relapse or how long the recovery period will be.. It’s just time. 

This time though is a bit different… I’ve had a longer period off work and I really do think it’s benefitted me and my recovery, I did want to go back to work at the end of July but when it came down to it, I just didn’t feel ready so I had another two weeks off work, which has really helped and now I am feeling a lot more stronger and confident to cope with a few hours at work. I’m also going to take my time with phased return too.. I’ve been a lot mor knowledgable with my money this time and have been able to save some money from previous wage slips so I can afford to carry the phased return period for a little longer. 

For those of you who are unsure what phased return to work is… It’s basically a schedule discussed with your doctor and manager of how many hours you can cope with when going back to work if you’ve been off for a long period or have been off with problems relating a condition or disability and then liaising with your doctor and manager you gradually increase the hours till eventually you are able to resume to your normal working pattern… some people however may need to reduce their normal working hours due to their health condition – something that I may consider, but like I said before… This condition is unknown and only time will tell how I’m going to feel. 

It’s my first day back today and I’m feeling good but also a little nervous, you know those first day back nerves.. I’m very lucky in the fact that majority of my colleagues have stayed in touch with me whilst I’ve been off and are all looking forward to seeing me, which will make going back a lot easier. I’m doing three hours a day at the moment 1-2 which I feel happy and confident with , my anxiety isn’t playing up at the thought of ‘oh what if I can’t cope’ because I’ve decided the hours that I can manage with at the moment.. You have to be strong when you do this.. At the end of the day this is YOUR body, YOUR life and only YOU know how you feel.. Although sometimes for me it’s hard to tell how I feel. 

I didn’t know if any of you would like me to document my phased return week by week? Let me know what you think to this idea or anything else you’d like to read. 🙂

I’m feeling positive and ready… So now I’m going to ‘slay’ the day and then after work I have to pop to the doctors to get another note for my phased return for me and then I’m going to see my best friend for a nice cup of tea and chill before coming home. 

I hope anyone reading this is having a good day and I’m sending you all hugs!

Much Love

Hannah xx

My Final Break Away! 

Yes.. the title is correct.. this is my final little break away before………. Going back to work! I have been off work with this relapse for just over 8 weeks battling through and going through the recovery process. It’s definitely not all been plain sailing, in fact there have been some heavy storms throughout my recovery period.. however I can finally say that I’m starting to come into remission and feeling a lot stronger again. 

So I decided to take myself away again to my Aunt’s house to stay with her, my Nana and Uncle for a few days just to build strength further. 

I had a lovely time and was very well looked after… I also felt like I could achieve more and that I didn’t need to sit down and rest as much as I had done previously.. I was also starting to walk small distances without my crutch (in the house) and try and use it on small journeys outside the house, which was a huge step one that made me feel so happy! 

My anxiety is a lot better also, not being afraid to do nice things whilst on recovery has really calmed down and I started to enjoy things a lot more (just sitting in my Aunt’s field observing the wildlife was one main thing) we even went to a local store called Downtown and had a look around.. it was so nice to feel okay and not feel like I was being spied on etc.. I know all of my work colleagues are fully supporting me and have told me that I need to go out, which is a great reassurance.. I know I don’t have to justify myself to anyone… But us with invisible illness get judged constantly and it’s so wrong on so many levels so to feel un-judged was lovely. 

Enough rambling now lol.. I’m going to insert some pictures of what I got up to whilst away! 

Ive also really been getting back into playing the piano.. it’s really been helping my MS and helping me to relax… If you’d like to see a video on me playing then head on over to my YouTube account– http://www.youtube.com/hannahsmithswj

1 Week into my Recovery Goals

I wrote a post last week about ‘Setting some Recovery Goals’ and seen as its been a week I thought I’d give you an update on how I was getting on… 

I’ll remind you all of the small goals that I’d set myself:- 

1) Preparing breakfasts and lunches at the end of the week (Sunday) – Okay so I have been going with the flow on this one I’ve been making sure I get breakfasts and make smoothie’s every day but I’m not making actual smoothie bags, however I definitely want to get back into the habit of making them so that when I go back to work life will be a little easier for me. Same with Lunches, I just need to get into the habit of making things so that I can just access them to make life easier.. But I’m getting there 🙂

2) Get up in the mornings at 9am, get washed, dressed, makeup and hair done so I’m ready for the day – This has been a very successful goal and I think it’s because I have been pushing myself to make the effort just to get up in the mornings, however whilst I’m writing this I’m having a ‘rest day’ of only a little makeup… Not much done to my hair and some comfy clothes on.. Cause let’s face it.. We can’t make an effort all of the time can we? 🙂

3) Practice the piano once a day – Again this has become a lovely habit that I have stuck too… Every day when I’ve felt like it I’ve played the piano, my Aunt also has given me daily piano lesson via Face Time, which has been great and I’m fINALLY almost finished learning my favourite song by my favourite composer Ludivico Einaudi called ‘I Giorni’ I’e been loving playing it’s been really relaxing and just taken me away from any troubles I may have had.. and the best part.. I play whenever I want 🙂 

4) Going for a walk every day – Yes I’m making sure I do this every day and I’m even starting to go out on my own without having an anxiety attack which is fantastic! I’m also trying to go a little bit further every day.. I do have ‘rest days’ where I choose whether to go out or whether to stay inside in my cosy clothes and watch episodes of Sex and The City, which because I’m choosing to do those it doesn’t feel like an entrapment in my own house. (if you understand?)

5) Writing Blog posts and interacting on social media –  So I’ve thrown myself out there a little and joined some social media blogging groups and loving it! I’m really enjoying connecting with new people and getting some blogging advice.. I’m also enjoying writing on my blog and just love writing in general, my dream one day is to do something like this for a living.. Who knows, dreams can come true right? 

And that is where I’m up to on my ‘Recovery Goals’ I’m really happy that I’m making progress and I love writing it down and sharing it with you guys reading this… I think I’ll keep writing weekly updates as it’s good to look back.. Or if I find myself in a similar situation again 9who know’s with MS) then at least I can look back and see that I got thought it once… I can sure do it again!

Thank You for reading

Love Hannah

A Break Away… 

Hello everyone 😊 how are you all today?

Today I’m going to go and stay with my Aunt, Grandmother and Uncle for a few days.. just for a “Break Away” or change of scenery…also to help build up my confidence about going out and to help my mental health and this relapse etc.. 

Picnic in the Country

So.. my first little adventure after having a rest when I arrived at my Aunt’s, was having tea at her field (we call it Riverside Meadows – it’s a fitting name because it’s next to a river and one of the fields looks like a meadow) she has horses and has had this field right from an early age! 

It’s so peaceful and tranquil… Perfect little get away to just forget about the rest of the world – the horses wanted to join in however. It’s just so nice to breath a different kind of air without feeling anxious or nervous about doing it… I have felt a little anxious because let’s face it anxiety does just go away, although I do feel a lot better being here and going out.

Tomorrow we are heading into town to get a couple of bits for my grandmother and to have a look around also – again the anxiety is there.. but I will accept it and deal with it.. I just need to keep telling myself that I AM allowed to go out as part of my recovery! 

A trip to Town

Good morning everyone, I hope you slept well? 

We are off to town this morning to have a little wander around the shops and to get a few bits… I’ve been using this amazing herbal relaxer by “Bach” and it’s brilliant for relaxing you.. you out a couple of drops onto your tongue and into some water and really does help you to relax! Unfortunately I’m running out so will need to pick up some more I get mine from Holland and Barrett.. and a fan for my bedroom because I was a tad warm last night lol! 

Since this relapse I’ve had smoothies every day for my breakfast… On a Sunday night I bag up a load of different fruits and add some greens (spinach or kale or both lol) put them all into the freezer so in the morning I just pick them out and blitz them up! This hasn’t changed since coming to my Aunt’s house.. here is a breakfast smoothie I made this morning! I also add oats to keep me fuller for longer! 

Right, I’m back from town! I think today is the longest I’ve walked in the 3 weeks I’ve been off!! Feeling quite tired now, so I know this afternoon I need to rest before going down to the field for our little evening supper. 

Whilst in town I visited a health shop and saw a lovely gentleman whose helping to relieve my anxiety through essential oils and aroma therapy oils.. I then popped into Boots to get some more Co-Codamol for the pain.. then to the Coop to get some bits to make homemade granola… Then back to my grandmother’s for a homemade chicken dinner… It’s been lovely to come away and not have to worry or do anything.. sometimes it’s nice to do this.. a nice treat in my reality.

Visiting Friends and Field adventures

Good Morning everyone I hope you all slept relatively well.. I did however woke up once but luckily managed to go back to sleep.

Today my Aunt and I are going to visit a friend who I haven’t seen for a long time… My Aunt is a piano teacher and she used to teach a gentleman and I used to go with her to their house and have coffee with his wife and play with their young son… But as time goes on we just get too busy with our lives don’t we? Now their son is in secondary school!! That makes me feel quite old.. and he’s having piano lessons now.

Once we arrived we were warmly greeted by our friend and had a lovely morning drinking tea and coffee.. they’re all lovely and I met their beautiful dog who is just so adorable.. I LOVE animals! 

I felt so relaxed and at ease whilst there… My anxiety didn’t affect me once, which is great! It comes and goes but not as bad as when I’m at home and going out..  just feeling a bit fatiguee today… 

12:30 and just had lunch made by my grandmother.. it was delicious and a real treat! Then having a little walk to the field with my crutches and Aunt afterwards, which was lovely seeing the horses and kitties.. I just love coming down here as is just so tranquil and relaxing! Sat in the barn listening to the rain.

Back now and sat in the front room resting whilst my Nana watches the Tennis 😊 my Aunt teaches this afternoon so I make sure I rest fully. 

And finally another evening supper in the barn at the field with a pony 😊 

Girls about town:- Mid-Morning tea, The Market, The Health Man and My first Bet! 

This morning my Aunt is taking me to visit The Market, it’s in every Wednesday where she lives and they sometimes have some good deals. 

Firstly we went to see this lovely little health chap in a hidden little health shop (a little like Holland and Barrett just much smaller) I loved it in here.. a lovely traditional shop filled with lots of wholesome goodies.. lots of veggie and vegan stuff too! We had been to see him on Monday and I’d explained about the anxiety and how I was feeling, he had told me that he was seeing his aromatherapist and would ask about me to see if she could help… Well we popped back today and he presented me with two essential oils… Neroli Oil and Juniper Berry Oil they are both quite strong in scent but ever so relaxing.. he told me I can use them in my diffuser at home.. or carry them around with me and if I feel an anxiety attack coming on I can use them! They’re quite expensive but I fully trust the man I spoke to because…. HE LISTENED TO ME! Shock horror right? Yep! And he’s really done his research for me.. so we purchased both bottles! 

After this we headed to a lovely little café for ‘Mid- Morning’ tea my Aunt knew this lovely gentleman who owned/ran it, we had a reserved table and greeted by a friendly welcome.. it was very traditional and quaint.. I love these cafés that have authenticity and kind of history to them.. we then had tea and it was absolutely delicious! At 10:15AM!! Haha

We didn’t eat all of the cakes lol, so took some home to enjoy later! Doesn’t it look beautiful presented 😊

(Image from TripAdvisor)

Once we had received ourselves we travelled around the market for a little walk around before heading home.. it was lovely and my anxiety is getting lower and lower which is great.. I’m finally feeling ‘ok’ about being out whilst off sick because seeing these beautiful places albeit slowly are definitely making me feel slowly better 😊 and I bought myself some lovely new trousers! 

To finish off our little day last night, my Aunt and I took the camping gear down to the field (all in the car lol) and had tea. It was very exciting setting all the camping bits up.. I helped whilst sat down (I’m getting quite good going off road on my crutches!!) And for our tea we had sweet potato with baked beans and for desert we had water melon.. delicious!! 

Garden Centre visit
Good Morning everyone, I am sat writing this whilst having a nice cup of tea and take some painkillers… I’m feeling quite exhausted today (I’m learning to to say tired lol) and the nerve pain is a little stronger today.. I think I may have just done a little too much yesterday, however I LOVED it and I just know that I need to rest more today.

So that is what today is all about… We had a relaxing morning at the house, I’ve been playing the piano a lot more whilst I’ve been here which has been lovely.. We then had a lovely home cooked lunch (my Nana is amazing!) Of chicken pie and veg.

Once we had had lunch we set off to visit a lovely garden centre fairly close to where my Aunt and Grandmother lived. It’s such a lovely place to visit for an afternoon, such lovely things to look at and of course we had to have a cup of tea! 

(This was a parrot they had called Max)

I also found this amazing kitchen gadget which will come in very useful! 

You basically put underneath whatever you want to chop and the pot does the job for you! This is going to make life so much easier for me and I can’t wait to start using it! 

The final supper at the field… I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my stay here this week, it’s been so lovely to not have to worry about anything, to not think of meals to cook etc I’ve been very spoilt and I’ll be forever grateful! So down we all go to the field for our final dinner.. cooking in the stove again… I can’t wait! 

A little Downtown trip

So… Last day with my Aunt and Grandmother before going home tomorrow.. I’ve really enjoyed my stay and found it so helpful and great to have this little ‘Break Away’… Even though this relapse is still affecting me.. I’m mentally able to manage it so much better 😊

An early start this morning to Downtown… My aunt and Grandmother come her often and have a meal in the cafe whilst looking around all the bargains… It was so nice to go with them today… I felt a bit of anxiety creep up onto me but I managed to keep it at bay! 

We had a delicious jacket potato, cheese and beans for lunch.. and then had a look around the lovely things 😁👍

I saw this BEAUTIFUL back pack after lunch.. the kind you fall in love with lol! It was by David Jones and I have one of his bags at home that I love too! It’s a pale pink bag pack satchel with rose gold detailing… I went away and had a look around some other bits… This was the first time I didn’t feel anxious or guilty about looking around the shops… 

As we were looking around I saw this beautiful top.. again a nice pale pink covered in butterflies and my Nana ever so kindly brought it for me 😊 

And now down to the field – this has been my ritual and determination whilst being here.. no matter how tired I felt or if I was in pain I WAS going to have my tea at the beautiful field and guess what…. I DID IT! Off road with my crutches as well lol! 😊 *High five*! 

Now I’m home with my boys! Going to have a relaxing night with them both and watch Dr Who 😊 

Thank you so much for reading.. I hope you’ve all enjoyed it! Sorry it’s been long! 

Lots of Love

Hannah xx

How to eat Healthy when Sick

Hey everyone.. so whilst being off work sick there have been times where actually preparing and cooking food have been really difficult and sometimes I physically can’t do it.. so I have put together a little meal plan to help me through the day at home alone.. 

All the food I’m mentioning I have mostly prepared with help from my partner on a Sunday so we have things for the week. 

Breakfast

Smoothies 


As you can see in the above picture there’s a freezer bag with alsorts in.. on Sunday we chopped up some bananas and put them in a freezer bag combined with frozen fruit and some spinach, we did this 5 times social have smoothies for breakfast or snacks for the week. 

All I needed to do this morning was out the bag if frozen ingredients into my blender with some liquid and blend it up.. I also added a tbsp of ground flax seed mix. 

Edit

Granola with fruit and yogurt


I’ve had this meal for breakfast a lot whilst being off.. the fruit we normally prepare the night before as sometimes I’ve needed help so in the morning all I need to do is add my chosen yogurt (soy plain) and granola (Jordan’s raisin and Almond) 

Lunch


Lunch we’ve been keeping very simple and easy.. I’ve been using up the ham and cheese we have in the fridge so again on Sundays we’d make sandwiches for the next 3 days and also chop up some carrot sticks, pepper and celery, some fruit usually melon, some crisps and a snack bar.. I out all this (apart from crisps and bar) into the fridge so then when I’m home alone I can just grab food put the fridge to eat that’s already prepared.. this has been great whilst I’ve been off poorly! 

Dinner


So for dinner.. my partner has been cooking for me because I’m struggling to stand up for periods of time.. I do sit at the table and help prepare salad.. again we’ve been keeping this very simple.. we’ve been eating a lot of “bowl food” lol.. so rice, lots of salmon and veggies with usually a dash of sweet chilli sauce.. 

This is much better than heading for that take away which I’m not going to lie.. I have been to the take away a few times whilst I’ve been off poorly.. you just have to eat what you fancy but I’ve definitely felt an improvement on my health eating good wholesome foods. 

I hope you enjoyed this blog post, please leave me any comments in the comments section below and I’ll be sure to answer them 😊

Much love

Hannah xx

Another MS relapse! 

Hey everyone..  well… We are here again!! Another MS relapse!

So.. how did it come about you’re all wondering?! Well with an MS relapse you never really know how they happen.. I suppose you’re more susceptible if you have an infection or have really over done things.. but this wasn’t the case this time. I’ve been feeling more fatigue lately and have had little twinges and things… But Tuesday night I went to bed with pretty severe nerve pain down my left side and in my legs.. I took 2 solpadol tablets and went to sleep.

Wednesday morning I woke up and still have a bit of pain and felt extreme exhaustion.. I continued to get ready for work etc, then George and I left for work. Whilst on the bus I came over even more fatigued to the point I started feeling almost faint! Then the feeling down my left side went!! I could feel my arm, face and leg! 

I grabbed George and he took my things and told me to get off the bus.. I went to stand up and just fell! It was so ebarrassing, George had to pull me up and drag me off the bus! Then comes the fear and emotions.. in tears at the bus stop I ring the hospital.. the receptionist told me to come straight to A&E.. here we go again then!

I get a call from my dad.. he was currently up north working (he also lives up there too) he immediately said “I can cancel my day, would you like me to come down?” And as soon as I said yes he was in the car and on his way! 

After getting to the hospital, having a ton of tests, George and my dad insisting the take photos to cheer me up.. the doctors said it was more than likely to be another MS relapse but we needed to wait to see if anything changed in 24-48 hours… So, I could go home! 

And here we are! I’ve been resting a lot and getting a lot of help from my lovely George.. I honestly don’t know where Id be without him! Hes having to do an awful lot for me at the moment.. dressing me and getting ready etc.. if you have someone who looks after you, hopefully youll understand how grateful I am to have him around. 

If anyone has any questions just let me know in the comments and I’d love to connect with you all! I hope you’re all having a good day and I’ll just try and get through this relapse… Again!! 

Love you all! 

Hannah xx